


Keeping Up with the Reserve Course

by Hella_Queer



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Chatting & Messaging, Class Trials (Dangan Ronpa), Group chat, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Multi, chat fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-15 17:35:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29811978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hella_Queer/pseuds/Hella_Queer
Summary: Miles Edgeworth:We don’t even know his name, yet he’s turned us inside out. His very existence has captivated us so completely. How remarkable for a reserve course student
Relationships: Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito, Kuzuryu Fuyuhiko/Pekoyama Peko, Sonia Nevermind/Tanaka Gundham
Comments: 33
Kudos: 72





	1. Who???

**Author's Note:**

> Was in the mood for something a little ridiculous. Check the end notes for the name cheat sheet!

**Future Criminals Club**

**Mia Fey:** @everyone Kuzuyru has a matter he would like to discuss

 **Catherine:** Is something the matter Fuyuhiko? 

**Surgeon Simulator:** You’re not hurt again are you?!

 **Steel Samurai:** He’s perfectly healthy. I’ve been helping with changing his bandages and flushing out the area 

**Surgeon Simulator:** That’s good! Please come see me in about two weeks for another checkup! If you have the time! 

**Samus Aran:** Stop shouting so much!

 **Surgeon Simulator:** Ahhh I’m sorry! 

**Larry Butz:** Still can’t believe you brought a gun to a knife fight and lost!

 **Yakuza 0:** I didn’t lose! The coward snuck up on me 

**Yakuza 0:** And that’s not the point!

 **Yakuza 0:** You all know my sister, Natsumi. I need you to watch her and see who she hangs around with 

**Yakuza 0:** Because if the rumors are true some dumb bastard thinks he can date my sister without getting permission!

 **Street Fighter:** ….. huh????

 **Larry Butz:** Is this a yakuza thing or a big brother thing 

**Steel Samurai:** Both 

**Larry Butz:** Oh shit rip to that guy

 **Larry Butz:** Or girl? Do we know?

 **Steel Samurai:** As far as we know it’s a male 

**Guitar Hero:** Annnnd Ibuki hasn’t seen Natsumi sneaking around our dorms. So it must be another reserve course guy! 

**Catherine:** Why can’t you just speak with Natsumi? She admires you greatly! I’m sure she will open up if you provide a gentle ear 

**Diner Dash:** Little siblings don’t talk about their romantic endeavers and frankly I’m grateful 

**Larry Butz:** You? Not wanting to hear about sexcapades?

 **Guitar Hero:** Sexcapades is the name of my new band

 **Diner Dash:** NOT WHEN ITS MY BABY SISTER AND BROTHER I HAVE LIMITS 

**Street Fighter:** Are we really gonna get away with spying tho? I mean Natsumi is from a yakuza family too won’t she notice when we start paying more attention to her?

 **Yakuza 0:** I’m not saying to follow her like a bloodhound! Half it you bastards don’t go to class anyway so just. I don’t know! Have your picnics or whatever closer to the reserve course buildings and see if you can pin down who she talks to

 **Mia Fey:** Hey hey

 **Mia Fey:** Don’t you have a friend in the reserve course Mahiru?

 **Lotta Hart:** ….. was hoping nobody would bring that up 

**Yakuza 0:** DO YOU KNOW WHO NATSUMI IS DATING

 **Yakuza 0:** WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY ANYTHING

 **Lotta Hart:** It ain’t like we’re close! She and Sato are finally being civil and she’s stopped messing with me. I’m not about to ruin that by violating her privacy 

**Street Fighter:** But you Do know her boyfriend?

 **Lotta Hart:** I don’t know if they’re dating but I’ve got a pretty good idea of who the rumors are about 

**Lotta Hart:** But I’m not helping you. So don’t think you can follow me around for answers!

 **Samus Aran:** As if I care about who that brat is dating. I feel sorry for the guy 

**Yakuza 0:** Watch your mouth!

 **Samus Aran:** Whatevvvvvver let’s go get lunch already!

 **Samus Aran:** Sigh 

**Samus Aran:** Yes Mikan you too

 **Surgeon Simulator:** Ah!

 **Surgeon Simulator:** Thank you~~

 **Guitar Hero:** Ibuki too! Ibuki too!

 **Yakuza 0:** I’ll remember this the next time one of you bastards asks for help!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sonia: **Catherine**  
>  Akane: **Street Fighter**   
> Ibuki: **Guitar Hero**   
> Hiyoko: **Samus Aran**   
> Mikan: **Surgeon Simulator**   
> Mahiru: **Lotta Hart**   
> Chiaki: **Mia Fey**   
> Peko: **Steel Samurai**  
>  Fuyuhiko: **Yakuza 0**   
> Gundham: **Dark Souls**   
> Nekomaru: **Dick Gumshoe**  
>  Soda: **Larry Butz**  
>  Teruteru: **Diner Dash**   
> Imposter: **Agent 47**  
>  Nagito: **Miles Edgeworth**  
>  Ryota: **Amulet Spade**


	2. What! When?!

**Future Criminals Club**

**Dick Gumshoe:** OH MY GOD YOULL NEVER BELIEVE WHAT I JUST WITNESSED

 **Dick Gumshoe:** SOMEONE WAS LIFTING WITH HORRENDOUS FORM 

**Mia Fey:** It wasn’t Fujisaki was it? 

**Dick Gumshoe:** Goodness no! I am seeing them and that gang leader friend of theirs on Thursday though 

**Street Fighter:** Class 78 is fucking weird dude. The Dean’s daughter, a cop’s son, a gang leader, a serial killer 

**Larry Butz:** W

 **Larry Butz:** What was that last one?

 **Street Fighter:** Owada! He’s the leader of the crazy diamonds! 

**Yakuza 0:** We’ve crossed paths a few times. His men know a few of mine. He’s loud but a good liar. Respectable 

**Catherine:** Of course you would think lying is a respectable skill! Honesty is the only way you can unite your people!

 **Steel Samurai:** Is that so? Then why don’t you tell Teruteru what really happened to his… specially molded chocolate bar

 **Larry Butz:** Miss Sonia! Don’t tell me!

 **Catherine:** I have no idea what you’re talking about Peko

 **Diner Dash:** Was my phallic masterpiece enjoyable princess ;)

 **Samus Aran:** Keep your filthy mind and hands away from her you creep!

 **Street Fighter:** Shut up! Coach was tryin to tell us something! 

**Mia Fey:** Yes Nekomaru?

 **Dick Gumshoe:** Someone was giving Natsumi a piggyback ride!

 **Yakuza 0:** WHAT

 **Yakuza 0:** WHO

 **Dick Gumshoe:** I didn’t see his face! I heard Natsumi laughing and when I turned my head she was being whisked away! 

**Dick Gumshoe:** But he was wearing a reserve course uniform! And had brown hair! And he had orange shoe laces! 

**Samus Aran:** Orange? That color is soooooo highschool 

**Yakuza 0:** You saw his shoes but not his damn face!? 

**Street Fighter:** Chill out baby gangsta! At least now you have two things to look for

 **Catherine:** Without the liberty of personalizing their clothing I suppose shoes are the last resort 

**Surgeon Simulator:** But isn’t that also violating the dress code?

 **Guitar Hero:** Ooooo Natsumi likes a bad boy~~~

 **Yakuza 0:** SHES A YAKUZA SHE DOESNT NEED A BAD BOY

 **Yakuza 0:** I’m gonna string that fucker up by his dumbass shoelaces 

**Mia Fey:** Huh

 **Mia Fey:** Orange. Shoelaces 

**Guitar Hero:** Do you know someone like that Chiaki?

 **Mia Fey:** Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

 **Amulet Spade:** Sorry! She fell asleep on the keyboard 

**Amulet Spade:** I asked for company in the computer lab. I should’ve known this atmosphere was too tempting 

**Amulet Spade:** But uhhhh I also saw Natsumi with someone

 **Yakuza 0:** Seriously?! When!

 **Amulet Spade:** …… like an hour ago

 **Yakuza 0:** I hate all of you so much 

**Street Fighter:** No you don’t :P

 **Yakuza 0:** I know I don’t! 

**Yakuza 0:** Speak 

**Amulet Spade:** Ok so I was under one of the computers bc some wires came loose and when Natsumi came in I didn’t wanna pop out like a creeper so I kinda. Stayed hidden 

**Diner Dash:** Like a creeper 

**Samus Aran:** You’re one to talk!

 **Diner Dash:** I’m always upfront about my intentions! Consent is the most important thing in any activity 

**Street Fighter:** Sexcapade 

**Amulet Spade:** N E Way!

 **Amulet Spade:** I also saw orange shoelaces. I didn’t wanna be seen so I didn’t see his face but he sounded average. His voice wasn’t soft or super deep. And he had a fidget cube linked on his belt loop!

 **Guitar Hero:** How were they acting? Like is this a new couple situation or a secret relationship for years kinda thing?

 **Yakuza 0:** Years?! 

**Amulet Spade:** She asked if he would take her to the movies this weekend. Since the reserve students have to fight over getting a dorm. I guess Mr Orange doesn’t live on campus. I think she mentioned him being near the big shopping plaza?

 **Larry Butz:** Foundation Circle?

 **Amulet Spade:** Yeah! Man that place is so cool. Maybe I should go…

 **Yakuza 0:** How tall do you think he is Nidai?

 **Dick Gumshoe:** About 5’9! But judging height is hard when you all seem so tiny to me hahahaha

 **Dark Souls:** Don’t mistake my lack of vertical existence as a weakness! My presence stretches farther than that!

 **Catherine:** Gundham has been picking animal shelters for the university to sponsor! We must find homes for all of these little familiars <3

 **Guitar Hero:** When the occult couple is more wholesome than the mafia couple 

**Yakuza 0:** I’m ignoring that

 **Street Fighter:** So we’re looking for a 5’9 guy in a black suit with brown hair, orange shoelaces, a fidget cube, and balls big enough to put the moves in Natsumi Kuzuryu

 **Street Fighter:** Should be a piece of cake!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sonia: **Catherine**  
>  Akane: **Street Fighter**   
> Ibuki: **Guitar Hero**   
> Hiyoko: **Samus Aran**   
> Mikan: **Surgeon Simulator**   
> Mahiru: **Lotta Hart**   
> Chiaki: **Mia Fey**   
> Peko: **Steel Samurai**  
>  Fuyuhiko: **Yakuza 0**   
> Gundham: **Dark Souls**   
> Nekomaru: **Dick Gumshoe**  
>  Soda: **Larry Butz**  
>  Teruteru: **Diner Dash**   
> Imposter: **Agent 47**  
>  Nagito: **Miles Edgeworth**  
>  Ryota: **Amulet Spade**


	3. WHERE?!?!

**Future Criminals Club**

**Yakuza 0:** HOW HAVE WE ALL SEEN HIM AND YET NOT SEE HIM AT ALL

 **Yakuza 0:** SOMEONE FKYERJN FUCKING STATUS REPORT 

**Agent 47:** From Ryota’s description, I can say I heard a male with an average pitched voice in the administration office Monday morning. He was speaking with the Dean about some kind of infraction. I heard Kuzuryu’s name mentioned but did not see her 

**Yakuza 0:** And you didn’t see this guy at all?

 **Agent 47:** I’m afraid not. I was only there for a short while. I attempted to wait outside in the hall but I would have been late for my class so I departed 

**Amulet Spade:** Chiaki and I DID go to Foundation Circle and we got cinnamon pretzels!

 **Amulet Spade:** We also saw Natsumi and Mr Orange who was carrying a big stack of bags and boxes so we didn’t see his face 

**Street Fighter:** Coach and I were taking a cool down run around the track and we saw them in the pond! Dude was wearing a big ass sun hat 

**Dark Souls:** The Dark Queen and I were searching the grounds for the perfect spot to perform our moonlight harvesting ritual later this month. We spotted the mortals in question on the edge of the tree line 

**Catherine:** They seemed to be having a picnic! The bento boxes were so cute, and the blanket had a wonderful blue and pink pattern. But Mr. Orange had his back to us. We tried getting closer but the Dark Devas got agitated :( 

**Dark Souls:** Perhaps they sensed something from this mysterious stranger. It is odd we have not seen his face. Has he casted a glamour? Or worse, is he enchanting this poor young woman?! Such a vile creature preying on an open heart!

 **Larry Butz:** ….. listening to you talk makes me tired 

**Diner Dash:** Kazuichi was helping me unload the catering truck in the student parking lot on Wednesday. We happened upon the lovely Miss Kuzuryu but her mysterious paramour did not show his face 

**Lotta Hart:** Why does that sound more like an alibi than a report? You weren’t being inappropriate were you?

 **Steel Samurai:** I should remind you that while I serve Master Fuyuhiko, when he is secure my next charge to protect is Natsumi. That goes for eliminating threats, as well as stopping them before they happen 

**Samus Aran:** In other words peeping Toms get pulled like weeds, thrown into the wood chipper, and turned into ground beef!!

 **Samus Aran:** Did I get that right Pekoyama?

 **Steel Samurai:** Precisely 

**Samus Aran:** Yay! 

**Diner Dash:** Of course not! I was a perfect gentleman!

 **Diner Dash:** I…. may have offered a few strawberries… from my hand.. but only because there weren’t any plates available!

 **Diner Dash:** Kazuichi back me up on this!

 **Larry Butz:** No way man dig your own grave!

 **Yakuza 0:** Is this going somewhere or am I taking a wrench to your knees?

 **Larry Butz:** Jeez relax! 

**Larry Butz:** Since I’ve got some brains under this beanie I asked if she was waiting for the family car or Fuyuhiko

 **Larry Butz:** She yelled at me for being in her business but I did hear her muttering “he’s always late that slacker” as she was furiously texting 

**Street Fighter:** So Mr Orange has a car!!

 **Amulet Spade:** Or they were going to share a cab 

**Catherine:** Going off campus on a weekday! How rebellious!

 **Agent 47:** If this is your definition of a bad boy I shudder at your standards 

**Yakuza 0:** None of this would be happening if SOMEONE OPENED HER MOUTH ALREADY 

**Lotta Hart:** I told you I’m not a spy! Either talk to your sister like a man or keep running around like a chicken 

**Mia Fey:** Hmmm

 **Mia Fey:** That’s funny 

**Catherine:** What’s funny? 

**Mia Fey:** Ibuki, Hiyoko and Mikan haven’t mentioned anything yet 

**Surgeon Simulator:** I don’t stray far from the medical building. If I saw Natsumi I wouldn’t be able to say because of patient confidentiality!

 **Guitar Hero:** I have eyes all over the music wing! But no sightings of Barbie gangsta or Mr Orange 

**Street Fighter:** Baby and Barbie Gangsta I love that!

 **Yakuza 0:** I hate you 

**Samus Aran:** I got bored of this so I asked Mahiru to tell me

 **Yakuza 0:** W H A T

 **Yakuza 0:** KOIZUMI

 **Lotta Hart:** NO

 **Miles Edgeworth:** How Interesting 

**Larry Butz:** Jesus fuck he scared me 

**Yakuza 0:** There you are! If anyone can move like an eel it’s you. There’s no way you don’t know something 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Mmmm

 **Miles Edgeworth:** So Very Interesting 

**Larry Butz:** If we ignore him will he go back to lurking?

 **Miles Edgeworth:** We don’t even know his name, yet he’s turned us inside out. His very existence has captivated us so completely. How remarkable for a reserve course student 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Well. Some of us know his name. 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Three of us to be exact 

**Street Fighter:** Huh?

 **Catherine:** Three? But the only ones who know him are Mahiru and Hiyoko

 **Miles Edgeworth:** Do you truly believe that? 

**Agent 47:** You just watched us report what we saw. Unless you’re accusing Mikan of withholding information 

**Surgeon Simulator:** Meeeeee?!?! Bbbbbut I already said why I wouldn’t be able to!

 **Miles Edgeworth:** You said if Natsumi came in, presumably for treatment, you wouldn’t be able to say because of patient confidentiality

 **Surgeon Simulator:** That’s the truth! All medical professionals have a duty to their patients!!

 **Miles Edgeworth:** Of course they do! That goes for everyone on campus

 **Miles Edgeworth:** Including Mr Orange

 **Surgeon Simulator:** h-h-huuuh??

 **Miles Edgeworth:** Apparently Mr. Orange is the kind of guy who gets sent to the Dean. It’s not too big of an assumption to think he’d get into physical trouble. With all the descriptions you’ve seen, not to mention how it seems Natsumi is always with him, I think it’s a safe bet to say even if you didn’t catch on immediately, Natsumi’s presence would be enough to tip you off, if he came into the medical building 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Not being able to confirm seeing someone also means you can’t confirm not seeing them. Right?

 **Yakuza 0:** What the hell are you talking about?

 **Miles Edgeworth:** If Tsumiki saw either of them, she wouldn’t be able to say. But telling us that she Hasn’t seen them would also violate that privacy. 

**Street Fighter:** That doesn’t make any sense! Not seeing someone isn’t like a crime or anything 

**Mia Fey:** It’s like the riddle with two doors… and one always lies while the other tells the truth 

**Mia Fey:** I think 

**Steel Samurai:** You’re just assuming Mikan could’ve seen him. If she can’t confirm or deny then it doesn’t matter if she did, since we won’t know the truth 

**Miles Edgeworth:** The truth exists regardless of who knows about it. Unlike a secret which needs two people, the truth can live all on its own 

**Yakuza 0:** So you don’t know anything

 **Miles Edgeworth:** I didn’t say that. Someone always knows something 

**Miles Edgeworth:** What that someone does with that something is what makes things fun

 **Larry Butz:** I liked it so much better when you weren’t talking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sonia: **Catherine**  
>  Akane: **Street Fighter**   
> Ibuki: **Guitar Hero**   
> Hiyoko: **Samus Aran**   
> Mikan: **Surgeon Simulator**   
> Mahiru: **Lotta Hart**   
> Chiaki: **Mia Fey**   
> Peko: **Steel Samurai**  
>  Fuyuhiko: **Yakuza 0**   
> Gundham: **Dark Souls**   
> Nekomaru: **Dick Gumshoe**  
>  Soda: **Larry Butz**  
>  Teruteru: **Diner Dash**   
> Imposter: **Agent 47**  
>  Nagito: **Miles Edgeworth**  
>  Ryota: **Amulet Spade**


	4. Recipe for a bad boy

**Future Criminals Club**

**Larry Butz:** This guy is absolutely fucking with us

 **Larry Butz:** Like he’s enjoying this shit 

**Larry Butz:** Fuyuhiko don’t let Peko do all the work I want in on crushing this guy

 **Steel Samurai:** You sound particularly passionate. Something big must have happened 

**Larry Butz:** I talked to him 

**Yakuza 0:** Are you serious?! 

**Guitar Hero:** What did he say! When did you see him?! 

**Larry Butz:** In the student parking lot this morning. I was testing out the RC cars I’m modding and I saw them pulling in

 **Guitar Hero:** So you finally saw his face!!!

 **Larry Butz:** Not. Exactly 

**Larry Butz:** There was a helmet involved you see

 **Dick Gumshoe:** Who needs a helmet for a car?

 **Dick Gumshoe:** Oh

 **Guitar Hero:** No way no way no way!! Mr Orange drives a MOTORCYCLE!!!

 **Steel Samurai:** If you see a desk in the hallway Fuyuhiko threw it 

**Larry Butz:** It wasn’t like a real motorcycle! Not like a big one! Just like a dirt bike!

 **Street Fighter:** That’s basically a training motorcycle! 

**Yakuza 0:** Wait so you’re telling me Natsumi was riding with him? 

**Surgeon Simulator:** Oh I hope she was wearing a helmet too! 

**Larry Butz:** She was. A pink one 

**Guitar Hero:** What color was his?

 **Larry Butz:** Black

 **Yakuza 0:** ARE YOU KIDDING ME

 **Guitar Hero:** Petition to change his name from Mr Orange to Ultimate Bad Boy!

 **Yakuza 0:** N O 

**Street Fighter:** Baby Bad Boy? 

**Amulet Spade:** Is anyone else really disappointed that his helmet isn’t orange? 

**Larry Butz:** Black is easier to hide his face he said 

**Steel Samurai:** So he’s onto us 

**Lotta Hart:** Kinda hard not to catch on with the way y’all ‘spy’

 **Guitar Hero:** I thought my fake finger mustache was very organic 

**Amulet Spade:** What else did he say Soda?

 **Larry Butz:** Hang on I’m in the computer lab transcribing the recording 

**Catherine:** You got it on tape! How resourceful 

**Larry Butz:** Hehehe well yeah you know always ready to get my hands dirty for the cause 

**Catherine:** Marvelous! Then you can assist Gundham and I this weekend while we walk the dogs at the newly sponsored Hope’s Peak Animal Shelter!

 **Dark Souls:** Thanks to my increased levels in charmspeak I was able to persuade Dean Kirigiri. The Ultimates who deal with beasts now have a sanctuary where they farm for skill points. 

**Street Fighter:** Soooo you guys get class credit for volunteering?

 **Larry Butz:** Exactly! 

**Samus Aran:** I’d pay money to see Kazuichi dragged through the streets like a rag doll hehehe 

**Diner Dash:** Maybe our ultimate nurse can meet an ultimate vet ;) Unleash the animal that lives dormant inside of you

 **Samus Aran:** Mikan would be a half drowned rat that crawled out of the sewer and almost gets hit by a car

 **Lotta Hart:** Hiyoko!

 **Samus Aran:** I said almost! She would get taken in by a shelter or something 

**Surgeon Simulator:** Oh how nice~~

 **Street Fighter:** On god we’re gonna get you some confidence Tsumiki

 **Larry Butz:** Ok ok ok I’ve got it all written out!

_Me: Hey! You on the bike!_

_N: You again?! I told you to get lost last time!_

_MO: It’s fine, Natsumi. Go on ahead I’ll catch up_

_Me: Not gonna take the helmet off are ya? I figured as much_

_MO: I was gonna get an orange one, but black seems to hide my face better_

_Me: So you know about that Huh?_

_MO: I didn’t at first. When Nekomaru dressed up as a potted plant outside the administration building I started paying more attention_

_MO: You should try hiding your hair. You stand out a lot more_

_Me: Shut up! Just do us all a favor and confront Fuyuhiko so he can take your ring finger as payment for dating his sister without permission_

_MO: ..._

_Me: Not gonna deny it?_

_MO: I didn’t confirm it either_

_Me: We’ve all seen you two together we aint dumb! The only thing stopping me from unmasking you right now is respect. Fuyuhiko gets first crack at your face. Let’s hope Mikan feels like patching up what’s left of you_

_MO: Honestly? It’s kind of funny. It’s been a while since I was involved in something like this. It makes the mundane days exciting_

_Me: So what you’re just gonna spend the next year wearing paper bags over your head?_

_MO: Of course not. I’ll give up the game…. once someone catches me_

**Miles Edgeworth:** Oh. 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Oh wow 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Oh what is this feeling that I’m feeling 

**Samus Aran:** Good job Kazuichi you’ve summoned the other freak 

**Steel Samurai:** So he’s actively working against us. 

**Amulet Spade:** Why is this the funniest thing since those bad Heathers animatics I did last summer 

**Lotta Hart:** Sato and Natsumi have never been more civil and honestly I’m grateful

 **Lotta Hart:** Thank you Fuyuhiko, for not being man enough to have a five minute conversation 

**Amulet Spade:** We still don’t know if Mikan is the third person who knows his name tho

 **Miles Edgeworth:** Perhaps more than three people know now 

**Street Fighter:** Do YOU know 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Not presently 

**Miles Edgeworth:** But I think the anonymity adds an extra layer of intrigue. Don’t you agree? 

**Yakuza 0:** First person to give me his name gets a prepaid credit card 

**Samus Aran:** How much is on the card?

 **Yakuza 0:** ¥100,000

 **Amulet Spade:** I just watched Mahiru tackle Hiyoko to get her away from her phone 

**Amulet Spade:** It was onto a beanbag in the dorm lounge but still! What strong arms!

 **Surgeon Simulator:** Be careful!! The coffee table has very pointy edges!

 **Miles Edgeworth:** Resorting to bribery? How desperate are you for answers to such a simple question?

 **Yakuza 0:** I don’t want answers. 

**Yakuza 0:** I want his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sonia: **Catherine**  
>  Akane: **Street Fighter**   
> Ibuki: **Guitar Hero**   
> Hiyoko: **Samus Aran**   
> Mikan: **Surgeon Simulator**   
> Mahiru: **Lotta Hart**   
> Chiaki: **Mia Fey**   
> Peko: **Steel Samurai**  
>  Fuyuhiko: **Yakuza 0**   
> Gundham: **Dark Souls**   
> Nekomaru: **Dick Gumshoe**  
>  Soda: **Larry Butz**  
>  Teruteru: **Diner Dash**   
> Imposter: **Agent 47**  
>  Nagito: **Miles Edgeworth**  
>  Ryota: **Amulet Spade**


	5. the devil went down to hope’s peak

**Future Criminals Club**

**Miles Edgeworth:** I just watched Kazuichi sign his soul away to the devil in real time

 **Catherine:** Can we handle another scandal? Everything is already so much 

**Miles Edgeworth:** He made a bet with Celeste Ludenberh 

**Catherine:** Oh I see. 

**Catherine:** We will mourn you properly, Kazuichi. 

**Larry Butz:** DONT GIVE UP ON ME SO SOON MISS SONIA 

**Yakuza 0:** What the hell are you doing messing around with her? She conned me out of my grandfathers watch last year and I still haven’t been able to win it back 

**Larry Butz:** It wasn’t my fault! It was a heat of the moment thing! She wouldn’t shut up about how poker was the superior card game, and Ishimaru put in a vote for speed, and then Nagito opened his big mouth about blackjack 

**Larry Butz:** So I told her that Uno was the top shelf card game and now if I lose I owe her ¥100,000!!!

 **Samus Aran:** You bet MONEY? Like a DUMBASS??

 **Larry Butz:** Her entire class was watching I couldn’t bet candy or some shit like that!

 **Larry Butz:** Chiaki you gotta help me

 **Mia Fey:** Me? 

**Larry Butz:** Yes! I talked Celeste into a team match. Only fair since she doesn’t play Uno you know? You’re the ultimate gamer there’s no way we can lose!

 **Miles Edgeworth:** I believe Nanami-san specializes in Video Games

 **Larry Butz:** There’s Uno online! I know all of 78 have a Switch it won’t be hard to convince Celeste to play that version 

**Larry Butz:** And even if we do play irl the brain is a computer! Just think of it like you’re playing a first person exploration game and if you win the card game against the mysterious bar patron she gives you the item you need to progress the story!

 **Street Fighter:** You sure put a lot of thought into this!

 **Larry Butz:** I may be impulsive! But that also means I’m a quick thinker 

**Larry Butz:** Speaking of which @Yakuza 0 that credit card is still up for grabs right?

 **Yakuza 0:** Absolutely 

**Larry Butz:** Sick!

 **Larry Butz:** Hey @Lotta Hart if I lose the bet, I’ll owe you a huge favor if you give me Mr Orange’s name so I can give Celeste the credit card 

**Street Fighter:** HOLY SHIT

 **Lotta Hart:** And if you win?

 **Larry Butz:** Then you can have the prize money, and I’ll be the one to rat out Mr Orange. You won’t be telling Fuyuhiko directly so it won’t count as you being his spy 

**Guitar Hero:** SODA IS THE HOPES PEAK UNIVERSITY TRAITOR CONFIRMED 

**Samus Aran:** Why aren’t you asking ME to reveal his name! I want the money!

 **Larry Butz:** Because Mahiru asked you not to 

**Samus Aran:** ….

 **Samus Aran:** HMPH

 **Street Fighter:** Are you cool with this double agent thing baby gangsta?

 **Yakuza 0:** I don’t care how it’s done, as long as I get what I want 

**Larry Butz:** Then it’s settled! 

**Larry Butz:** You’ll help me right? Chiaki? 

**Mia Fey:** Hm

 **Larry Butz:** Pretty please?

 **Mia Fey:** Hmmm

 **Larry Butz:** Pretty please with cotton candy sprinkles on top?

 **Mia Fey:** Hmmmmmmmmmm

 **Mia Fey:** If I help you….that means you should owe me a favor too

 **Mia Fey:** I think 

**Larry Butz:** Of course! A mechanic always keeps his word! 

**Guitar Hero:** Unless it’s a chop shop

 **Larry Butz:** A mechanic always keeps his word to someone!

🔍

* * *

🔎

**Catherine:** @Yakuza 0 Fuyuhiko? Can I ask you something?

 **Yakuza 0:** You just did 

**Catherine:** I wanted to know why this whole thing is bothering you so much. Natsumi is a smart young woman who should be able to make her own decisions. If she hasn’t opened up to you about her relationship then maybe…. 

**Catherine:** Maybe it’s not Mr Orange’s fault 

**Catherine:** Maybe she feels as if she can’t tell you 

**Yakuza 0:** Sumi used to tell me everything. She was the person I trusted most after Peko. Thinking she doesn’t feel the same…

 **Yakuza 0:** None of those reserve course bastards respect her! They’re a bunch of clones eating each other like zombies. Ain't saying she should be in the main course but she deserves better than that!

 **Catherine:** Would you rather have her dating someone from the main course then? Like Makoto from class 78? Or Nekomaru?

 **Yakuza 0:** Hell no! I’d be after their heads too! Only difference is I know where to find them 

**Yakuza 0:** This guy is toying with us. And Natsumi is letting him. I don’t fucking get it 

**Amulet Spade:** How did these rumors even start? It’s been a year since she came to the university. Why would they just start popping up now?

 **Miles Edgeworth:** I think the better question is why is our Mr Orange suddenly in the spotlight 

**Larry Butz:** Jumpscared again! 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Like hugging your worst enemy just to put a kick me sign on their back. 

**Amulet Spade:** You’re saying he’s being set up to be the bad guy

 **Street Fighter:** By who??? 

**Miles Edgeworth:** How does that saying go? Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer 

**Guitar Hero:** You think Natsumi is trying to get him into trouble?! But why! That’s her boyfriend!

 **Miles Edgeworth:** Is the narrative we’ve all been working with. Those of us who aren’t in the know that is 

**Lotta Hart:** I’ve been personally asked to keep my hands clean of this. Kazuichi’s request would betray that I know 

**Guitar Hero:** Really playing both sides here girlie 

**Lotta Hart:** I’m a photographer. My skills are to observe and document not to interfere 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Oh?

 **Larry Butz:** Don’t fucking say it

 **Miles Edgeworth:** How Interesting 

**Larry Butz:** FUCK OFF

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sonia: **Catherine**  
>  Akane: **Street Fighter**   
> Ibuki: **Guitar Hero**   
> Hiyoko: **Samus Aran**   
> Mikan: **Surgeon Simulator**   
> Mahiru: **Lotta Hart**   
> Chiaki: **Mia Fey**   
> Peko: **Steel Samurai**  
>  Fuyuhiko: **Yakuza 0**   
> Gundham: **Dark Souls**   
> Nekomaru: **Dick Gumshoe**  
>  Soda: **Larry Butz**  
>  Teruteru: **Diner Dash**   
> Imposter: **Agent 47**  
>  Nagito: **Miles Edgeworth**  
>  Ryota: **Amulet Spade**


	6. who plays the player

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome class 78 to the fray!

**Nintendont Underestimate Us**

**the little mermaid:** @everyone Welcome friends and foes to the first and hopefully not last Class Crossover Card Smackdown! I’ll be your lovely class 78 MC, Aoi Asahina!

 **Red Riding Hood:** Because you cheated at the Rock Paper Scissors tournament!

 **the little mermaid:** Where’s your evidence?

 **the little mermaid:** That’s what I thought now hush! 

**the little mermaid:** In this corner we have the queen of liars, the goth Lolita princess, the reason we stay in our rooms after nighttime: Celeste Lundenbeeeeeerg

 **Maleficent:** Hello everyone. I’m looking forward to a nice clean game 🤞🏻

 **the little mermaid:** Joining her is the bad boy blueprint, the eyeliner king, the last thing you’ll see before sleeping with the fishes: Mondo Owadaaaaaaaaaaa

 **Yakuza 0:** MONDO?!?!

 **Mia Fey:** I would’ve guessed Fujisaki

 **Peter Pan:** Monda wipes the floor with us in most card games! 

**big bad wolf:** The gang shows no mercy. We use Uno to decide all kinds of shit 

**Red Riding Hood:** I had to win against the second highest ranking member in order to be accepted as Mondo’s Person. It was a tough battle but I never gave up! Underneath their ridicule was the warmth of his smile that guided me to victory!

 **Surgeon Simulator:** Oh 🥺

 **big bad wolf:** They love you now. You should see him walking around the garage wearing my jacket holding a bottle of root beer 

**Peter Pan:** It’s your lock screen!

 **Lotta Hart:** Oh that’s too cute! 

**Amulet Spade:** Fuyuhiko’s Lock Screen is Peko about to eat a biiiiig spoonful of ice cream it’s super cute 

**Goldilocks:** Uggggh we get it you’re in love or whatever whoop de fucking do

 **the little mermaid:** We interrupt this exciting pre game announcements to show off our cute lock screens! 

**Goldilocks:** There are single people in this chat! 

**Caterpillar:** Oh heeey Tsumiki I’ve been meaning to ask ya

 **Caterpillar:** Weed 

**Caterpillar:** Goooood for aching joints or like. Not good

 **Surgeon Simulator:** Uhh well I think it depends on any medications you might currently be taking, the method of administration ie. smoking vs edible vs oil, and the dosage. I recommend talking to your doctor if you have specific questions 

**Surgeon Simulator:** Oh! And remember to always eat less of the edible than you think you should for your first time. Panic attacks in a heightened state of reality can be very jarring and leave you at risk for long lasting effects like vomiting, crying, shaking and in extreme cases mild PTSD 

**Caterpillar:** wow

 **Gingerbread Man:** Pov you’re at a frat party and the girl standing alone in the corner takes the biggest hit from a bubblegum pink bong wyd

 **Caterpillar:** How do to is propose 

**Surgeon Simulator:** Hehehe

 **Red Riding Hood:** Would the announcer for 77 please introduce the challengers?

 **Street Fighter:** Right right right 

**Street Fighter:** And in THIS corner we’ve got the handyman, wreck it Ralph’s better half, he pops when you hop on top!

 **Larry Butz:** What

 **Street Fighter:** Kazuichi Sooooodaaaaaaaa

 **Street Fighter:** Joined at his hip is everyone’s favorite sleepy gamer girl, the class prez Princess, Chiaki Nanamiiiiiiiii

 **the little mermaid:** We’ve got a real show on our hands folks! One virtual match with all the bells and whistles, one traditional duel with specialized House Rules. Best of seven for each, with a death match tie breaker to end it all should it get that down and dirty!

 **Street Fighter:** The time? 3pm 

**the little mermaid:** The place? The media center of the reserve course building 

**Street Fighter:** The price? ¥100,000 and a whoooole lot of bragging rights 

**the little mermaid:** See you soon!

 **Street Fighter:** Be there or be square! 

**Samus Aran:** Why the reserve course media center? Ours is nicer 

**big bad wolf:** Yeah but Chihiro hooked some stuff up and is gonna broadcast it to their gym, which can hold more people 

**Larry Butz:** We’re gonna be filmed?! Why?

 **Maleficent:** Because this is a sporting event is it not? And what is a sporting event without spectators

 **Larry Butz:** Don’t tell me

 **Larry Butz:** The reserve course bet on this too didn't they 

**Dick Gumshoe:** How did they find out? The only ones who knew about it were our classes!

 **Peter Pan:** I’m not sure. Celeste just asked if I could rig up a few cameras 

**Maleficent:** I was approached soon after our wager by a few reserve course students and agreed to let them in on the fun

 **Yakuza 0:** Are you fucking serious?

 **Steel Samurai:** What did they look like?

 **Maleficent:** A loud girl with a bad attitude and blonde hair, and an unassuming brunette male who watched our surroundings like a hawk protecting its eggs

 **Amulet Spade:** Did the guy have orange shoelaces? Or a fidget cube on his belt? 

**Maleficent:** Yes

 **Maleficent:** How do you know this? 

**Guitar Hero:** That’s Mr Orange! Natsumi’s boyfriend!

 **Steel Samurai:** We truly do not have the time to explain and I honestly doubt it would be of any interest to you 

**Maleficent:** I see. Well then, in two hours Soda, Nanami-san.

🔍

* * *

🔎

**Tragic Backstory Factory**

**the little mermaid:** Who the heck is Mr Orange???

 **Jack & Jill:** How should we know! Their nurse does drugs on the low and I bet that big guy has permanently retired a few of his protégées 

**Goldilocks:** Not everyone is cool like that stop giving him so much credit! Everyone knows the big buff ones are super duper soft inside!

 **Gingerbread Man:** Murder isn’t cool???

 **Snow White:** Be honest Celeste. How much money are you winning from the reserve course?

 **Maleficent:** A Lot

 **Maleficent:** I do plan on winning but even if they best me I’ve casted my net far and wide 

**Prince Smarming:** You bet against yourself didn’t you

 **Maleficent:** I bet that I would lose at least five rounds 

**Caterpillar:** HHXHXJXJXHXHX FIVE?? OUT OF FOURTEEN??

 **the little mermaid:** I refuse to do the math but that’s some tricky odds to finagle and still come out on top 

**Snow White:** Ooooo finagle that’s a great word 

**the little mermaid:** Thank you!

 **Red Riding Hood:** I feel as if I should comment on how gambling is wrong and immoral and only leads to bad habits 

**Snow White:** Buuuuuut?

 **Red Riding Hood:** But if Mondo wins he said he’d take me to the aquarium in Towa City during next month’s long weekend and I very much would like to go

 **Goldilocks:** Taka Corruption Arc sexy rt if you agree 

**Humpty Dumpty:** I have the graphics all ready to scan Fujisaki-san! I didn’t have time to color them but my style is best suited for a grayscale color scheme 

**Peter Pan:** It’s fine, Hifumi! The actual gameplay will be in color so it’ll balance itself out 

**Prince Smarming:** I still can’t believe I was talked into participating in something like this 

**big bad wolf:** Oh please! You practically had your ear to the door trying to listen in!

 **Sleeping Beauty:** Let’s go over our jobs one more time, so that we aren’t fighting about it during the match. Makoto?

 **Prince Charming:** Ah ok! ^_^

 **Prince Charming:** Celeste and Mondo, obviously, will be in the media center with Chihiro and Taka, who is acting as Mondo’s uhhh cheerleader?

 **Red Riding Hood:** Correct!

 **A Sleuth of Bears:** Will you wear a skirt and shake pompoms?

 **Red Riding Hood:** Where would I get pompoms on such short notice?

 **Goldilocks:** SO THE SKIRT ISNT THE ISSUE??

 **Prince Charming:** Hina will be in the gym acting as our class commentator, along with Sakura and Kyoko who’ll act as crowd control 

**Prince Charming:** Sayaka and Toko will be at a table off to the side handling the bets! With Leon and Mukuro acting as bodyguards 

**Prince Charming:** While Junko, Hifumi and myself will be manning the concession stand! Byakuya will be in charge of collecting the money from that 

**Gingerbread Man:** And the staff is cool with all of this? 

**Sleeping Beauty:** Normally they wouldn’t be. It took a lot of convincing. My father is very strict when it comes to mixing family with education. 

**Maleficent:** Which is why we had to agree to giving 2/3s of the profit away to the Reserve Course Student Council 

**Caterpillar:** Awww maaaan that sucks ass 

**Caterpillar:** Hey wait what’s my job!

 **Snow White:** Idk go flirt with Tsumiki some more 

**Caterpillar:** Huh? 

**Fiona:** You’ll join us for crowd control. Your easy going personality will help combat our more clean cut personalities 

**Caterpillar:** Was that a self burn?

 **Fiona:** Not at all. 

**Fiona:** People already look at me differently because of my appearance. Kiyoko is the Dean’s daughter. We are not exactly the kind of people one would expect at a gambling event 

**Peter Pan:** Make sure people don’t litter! The cleanup is gonna be a pain without stepping on half chewed hot dogs 

**Red Riding Hood:** Where are we getting the food from again?

🔍

* * *

🔎

**Future Criminals Club**

**Larry Butz:** WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOURE CATERING THE EVENT WHAT THE FUCK

 **Diner Dash:** I could never deny a lady in need of my services. I’m honored Miss Celeste chose me for this little get together 

**Yakuza 0:** I’m gettin real tired of all these secrets 

**Diner Dash:** I’ll make sure to set aside something for you all before the reserve course gets their hands on all the grub. Consider it an apology!

 **Street Fighter:** Wait if there’s gonna be a bunch of RCS watching us do you think He’ll be there too?

 **Guitar Hero:** Now's your chance to ambush him Fuyuhiko! We just gotta see who Natsumi’s sitting with!

 **Larry Butz:** Can that wait until After the tournament? If I lose focus I’m gonna lose for sure!

 **Miles Edgeworth:** In order to win without going to a tie breaker you’ll need to win eight games in total. Ideally you go 4 in the first round and then 4 in the second, but what are the odds of that happening hahaha

 **Larry Butz:** YOU

 **Larry Butz:** Actually 

**Larry Butz:** Nagito! Buddy! Wanna be our team cheerleader? Boost our morale? 

**Mia Fey:** Motivational cheek kisses 

**Larry Butz:** Maybe not That

 **Miles Edgeworth:** Hahaha! Soda I admire your determination to get a leg up on the competition! But surely you don’t need my unpredictable luck to find victory 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Besides. You don’t need to worry about losing. You’ve got a foolproof plan that’ll cover your bases should you lose 

**Miles Edgeworth:** Unless someone beats you to it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Class 78!
> 
> Makoto: **Prince Charming**   
> Kyoko: **Sleeping Beauty**  
>  Aoi: **the little mermaid**  
>  Hiro: **Caterpillar**  
>  Sakura: **Fiona**  
>  Toko: **Jack & Jill**   
> Byakuya: **Prince Smarming**  
>  Junko: **Goldilocks**  
>  Mukuro: **A Sleuth of Bears**  
>  Chihiro: **Peter Pan**  
>  Mondo: **big bad wolf**  
>  Taka: **Red Riding Hood**  
>  Celeste: **Maleficent**  
>  Hifumi: **Humpty Dumpty**  
>  Leon: **Gingerbread Man**   
> Sayaka: **Snow White**


	7. we interrupt this programming for a brief panic attack

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The gang gets into a fear and anxiety inducing situation

**Future Criminals Club**

**Dick Gumshoe:** IM IN THE BATHROOM WHAT DID I MISS I CAN HEAR SHOUTING 

**Amulet Spade:** It’s the deciding game of round two! Team Kazuaki lost the online match :( 

**Agent 47:** They need to win game four or it’s all over!!

 **Surgeon Simulator:** Where are your lactate pills?

 **Dick Gumshoe:** …. My dorm

 **Surgeon Simulator:** Please!! No more dairy! 

**Guitar Hero:** OH MY GOOOD

 **Dick Gumshoe:** WHAT WHAT WHAT

🔍

* * *

🔎

**Nintendont Underestimate Us**

**Amulet Spade:** REVERSE THIS BITCH - CHIAKI NANAMI CLASS PRESIDENT AND MY FUCKING HERO 

**Gingerbread Man:** DONT LET EM BEAT YOU MOMDO

 **Caterpillar:** I haven’t been this invested in cards since I did that reading for this girl trying to find her dead uncle 

**Prince Charming:** We’ve just sold the last of the food! We should start cleaning up while everyone is still sitting down 

**Guitar Hero:** Roger that! Ibuki is on her way! 

**Prince Charming:** You’re not in the gym?

 **Samus Aran:** Being around all those reserve course students in their all black outfits was making me sweat! 

**Lotta Hart:** We’re watching from outside the media center. We can bring the big trash cans from the janitors closet 

**Diner Dash:** Please make sure all the silverware is accounted for and wrapped up! We don’t want any incidents 

**Goldilocks:** So like. A missing knife would count as an incident. Right?

🔍

* * *

🔎

**Tragic Backstory Factory**

**Snow White:** Is it just my imagination or are we being stared at?

 **Sleeping Beauty:** Who’s we?

 **Jack & Jill:** Everyone not in a black uniform 

**Gingerbread Man:** Ah yeah. It’s like being in a sea of men in black agents 

**Sleeping Beauty:** I will admit I don’t see the reserve course often. We are separated so thoroughly 

**Jack & Jill:** I don’t like it. Them 

**Jack & Jill:** I can smell hostility in the air. Fuckin creeps me out 

**Prince Charming:** Oh hey Jack! When’d you get here?

 **Jack & Jill:** Miss Morose got too close to a pepper shaker and I don’t feel like leavin! Gotta keep an eye on things 

**Prince Charming:** Komaru you mean 

**Jack & Jill:** Don’t tell me what I mean Big Mac!

 **Prince Charming:** That’s my sister???

 **Caterpillar:** DID ANYONE ELSE HEAR THAT EVIL CHUCKLE NEAR THE BACK????

 **A Sleuth of Bears:** Yes

 **Humpty Dumpty:** I’m starting to feel like a goldfish in a tank of sharks 

**Prince Smarming:** How many reserve course students are here?

 **Sleeping Beauty:** In total I believe there are 2358

 **Caterpillar:** 😨

 **Sleeping Beauty:** If you mean here in the gym then there are 61

 **Goldilocks:** Don’t tell me you’re actually afraid of these spineless straw men! They wanna be us so bad it’s pathetic 

**A Sleuth of Bears:** Do they want it bad enough to skin you for it? Because we’re missing a few sharp utensils

 **Sleeping Beauty:** Junko 

**Goldilocks:** ITS NOT MEEEEE ∑(ﾟДﾟ)

 **Snow White:** Now I’m really feeling sick we need to get out of here 

**Gingerbread Man:** We can’t leave Hina!

 **Prince Charming:** I’m staying with Jack. Toko. Them! Komaru is right up front with her friends I don’t want to lose sight of her 

**Sleeping Beauty:** We need someone at each exit 

**Snow White:** Stoooooop

 **Caterpillar:** I’m actually getting lightheaded 

**Gingerbread Man:** Fuck there’s not a gas leak is there are we gonna blow up?!

 **Goldilocks:** No gas! Unless you count Princess over there hahaha 

**Snow White:** Sonia would never!

 **Snow White:** She doesn’t look worried…

 **Jack & Jill:** The fuckin rat shes holdin looks ready to bolt!!

🔍

* * *

🔎

**Nintendont Underestimate Us**

**Steel Samurai:** I need everyone to stay calm 

**Jack & Jill:** THE LIGHTS WHAT HAPPENED TO THE LIGHTS WHY IS IT SO DARK 

**Sleeping Beauty:** The windows are covered…

 **Lotta Hart:** It’s going to be fine! We’ll protect you. You have your phones just turn on the flashlight 

**Gingerbread Man:** What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck

 **the little mermaid:** IS THAT A BODY 

**Humpty Dumpty:** THERES BLOOD I SEE BLOOD 

**Prince Charming:** Toko fainted!

 **Catherine:** All of you get into a corner, one of us will come guard you! Can someone take care of Fukawa?

 **Snow White:** Is that real blood? Are they dead nobody’s moving are they dead they can’t be dead what’s happening

 **Larry Butz:** We’re running to fix the lights!

 **Surgeon Simulator** We’ll get the doors open don’t worry!

 **Goldilocks:** Open? Why aren’t they open already!

 **Amulet Spade:** They’re locked 

**Goldilocks:** WHAT

 **A Sleuth of Bears:** It’s so loud everyone is screaming 

**Red Riding Hood:** We need security! 

**Miles Edgeworth:** @everyone turn your phones off immediately, find a partner link arms and disperse around the room

 **Miles Edgeworth:** NOW

🔍

* * *

🔎

**Tragic Backstory Factory**

**Red Riding Hood:** @everyone Can we all meet up in the lounge? I’d like to see everyone’s faces 

**Peter Pan:** My legs are kind of shaky…

 **big bad wolf:** I’ll come get ya Chi

 **Peter Pan:** <3

 **Goldilocks:** If I cry none of you say a damn word this is fuckin weird! Distress and chaos that I have no part in is just plain wrong!!! 

**Maleficent:** What a truly awful prank. Staging a murder, locking the doors, ranting about superiority. 

**Prince Smarming:** They sounded completely deranged. Like a bad villain in an even worse comic book movie 

**Gingerbread Man:** All this because of a game of cards? How desperate can you be! 

**Prince Smarming:** I don’t think this had anything to do with that 

**Humpty Dumpty:** At least it was only a handful of reserve students involved. If everyone had been in on it we would’ve been locked in the gym a lot longer 

**Gingerbread Man:** Pekoyama-senpai was almost a killer once the lights came on! Did you see the way she dropped that guy who tried to rush her corner? 

**Snow White:** Did you see Sonia straight up throat punch the guy who tried to step on Gundham? 

**Snow White:** Pretty girls who can beat your ass > anyone else 

**the little mermaid:** @Fiona <333

 **Fiona:** <3

 **Red Riding Hood:** I just spoke with Nanami-san! The conductors of the prank have been apprehended and will be receiving their punishment! She also assured me that her class is well and that we should rest and keep each other safe 

**Sleeping Beauty:** Had anyone actually been injured I am sure they would be expelled, but it seems a suspension is the worst they are getting. For now 

**Caterpillar:** What about the tournament?

 **Maleficent:** I have a no refund policy. Consider it payment for emotional damages. Repair money for the chair someone broke. Take your pick for an excuse 

**Maleficent:** At any rate Soda and I are calling it a draw for now. 

**Prince Charming:** I’m making a blanket fort in the lounge. I encourage everyone to join me. 

**Snow White:** Is Toko really spending the weekend with Komaru at your house???

 **Prince Charming:** Yes

 **Prince Charming:** Please don’t mention it again 

**Peter Pan:** I hope 77 are adjusting well. It was so brave of them to protect you guys! 

**A Sleuth of Bears:** They are our upperclassmen. Besides they’ve always been a little weird

 **Red Riding Hood:** Weird or not! I wish them a safe and comfortable weekend. I’m sure they’re all gathering together to comfort each other just like we are!

🔍

* * *

🔎

**Future Criminals Club**

**Larry Butz:** @Miles Edgeworth WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU GOT STABBED WHAT THE FUCK 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Makoto: **Prince Charming**  
>  Kyoko: **Sleeping Beauty**  
>  Aoi: **the little mermaid**  
>  Hiro: **Caterpillar**  
>  Sakura: **Fiona**  
>  Toko: **Jack & Jill**  
> Byakuya: **Prince Smarming**  
>  Junko: **Goldilocks**  
>  Mukuro: **A Sleuth of Bears**  
>  Chihiro: **Peter Pan**  
>  Mondo: **big bad wolf**  
>  Taka: **Red Riding Hood**  
>  Celeste: **Maleficent**  
>  Hifumi: **Humpty Dumpty**  
>  Leon: **Gingerbread Man**  
>  Sayaka: **Snow White**
> 
> Sonia: **Catherine**  
>  Akane: **Street Fighter**  
>  Hiyoko: **Samus Aran**  
>  Mahiru: **Lotta Hart**  
>  Chiaki: **Mia Fey**  
>  Peko: **Steel Samurai**  
>  Fuyuhiko: **Yakuza 0**  
>  Gundham: **Dark Souls**  
>  Soda: **Larry Butz**  
>  Teruteru: **Diner Dash**  
>  Imposter: **Agent 47**  
>  Nagito: **Miles Edgeworth**  
>  Ryota: **Amulet Spade**


	8. A Sharp Truth In Soft Darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In hindsight, because there was no other way to live his life, Nagito could see how he had pushed the envelope by being in an enclosed space with upwards of fifty people for such a long period of time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let’s check in on Nagito shall we?

What a completely unexpected turn of events!

In hindsight, because there was no other way to live his life, Nagito could see how he had pushed the envelope by being in an enclosed space with upwards of fifty people for such a long period of time. In all honesty he didn’t think too hard about it, too preoccupied with his classmates like usual. Perhaps if he had been a touch more self aware…

Things started off simple enough. He kept his distance from the reserve course, and acted as a runner for his classmates and class 78, bringing them drinks, snacks, napkins and whatever else they needed. Spreading out his presence was the best way he knew how to make sure none of his luck collected too much in one spot. 

If Nagito could pin down exactly when things went wrong, he would say it was just after he offered to get drinks for Pekoyama and Kuzuryu. They were hard at work scanning the crowd for Natsumi and Mr Orange, and he wanted them in top form! (And if sticking close by meant he got to see the mystery man before the others, well, that was just a bonus.)

He felt the shift in the air as he reached the other side of the gym. The hair on the back of his neck stood on end, his arms broke out in goosebumps, his shoulders tensed in anticipation. For a single moment he could see the room in its entirety. Everyone’s smiling faces, the gameplay on the projector, the heatwaves in the stuffy room. 

And then the world was plunged into darkness. 

It was quiet for the space of three heartbeats before voices started bouncing off the walls. Nagito stood frozen with his hands full of punch, eyes desperately trying to focus. An alarm was ringing in the back of his head, one that signaled danger, one that he usually ignored because he couldn’t escape the inevitable once his luck took a turn for the worst. But he couldn’t turn his back on his classmates! 

With the room quickly descending into chaos, Nagito easily snaked between bodies, heading towards the center of the room where the alarm seemed to ring loudest. He _might have_ thrown the cups of punch at people, but it’s not like anyone could prove it was him! 

It was then that lights began to appear: cell phone flashlights. They were easy to spot, class 78 in particular. From where he stood in the middle of the room Nagito could easily see their frightened faces. 

As well as the shadowed figures stalking towards them. 

As well as the bodies on the floor. 

Something was very very wrong here. 

Nagito whipped out his phone and typed a quick message to the group gaming chat. He was putting himself at risk but if it meant saving the others he didn’t give a damn! 

**Miles Edgeworth:** @everyone turn your phones off immediately, find a partner link arms and disperse around the room

 **Miles Edgeworth:** NOW

Just as quickly as they appeared, the little lights all around the room blinked out of sight. Nagito sighed in relief, hoping with half of his night that everyone would listen to him, and quickly. He let his own phone act as a beacon for a bit longer before slipping it into his pocket. He needed to find the exit, or one of his own classmates. Surely their collective good energy could keep his bad energy in check long enough to get all of their underclassmen to safety! 

And that’s when something sharp imbedded itself into his thigh. 

Nagito cried out, more shocked than pained, and would’ve crumbled to the ground had he not been caught by the bicep. The shadows were a bit easier to see now, and he watched through blurry, tearful eyes as the figure holding him up clocked his supposed attacker right in the nose. The familiar crunch of a broken bone sent a tingle down his spine. 

“C’mon,” a voice said so close to his ear it might as well have been in his brain. He half limped, half let himself be dragged through the dark, until he found himself in an even darker equipment room. The only reason he _knew_ it was an equipment room because he and his savior / future attacker tripped over a number of loose balls and rackets. 

“...ow.”

“Sorry.”

“Not your fault.” Nagito righted himself and sat up against the wall, hissing as the pain in his leg finally registered. Every time his heart beat his leg throbbed. 

“Try not to move too much.” Nagito rolled his head to the side and watched as his new companion searched the room using his own cell phone flashlight. When he turned— Nagito thought his voice was nice, not soothing but warm in a way. Calm maybe— he was holding a first aid kit. But that’s not what had Nagito catching his breath. 

His eyes, never wavering from Nagito’s face, seemed to stare right through him. The harsh red of the left, the cool green of the right; illuminated like this the guy looked like an archangel. As he kneeled down to inspect the _fucking switchblade sticking out of his leg_ , all Nagito could focus on was how brown hair looked darker in the shadows, how steady hands were covered in bruises and scratches. 

How, when he tilted his head just right, he could see the tip of an orange shoelace. 

Nagito grinned, chuckled, would have full on laughed if it didn’t cause his muscles to tense in protest. 

“How lucky,” Nagito purred, startling his temporary nurse. “I never thought I would be the one to meet Mr Orange in person, let alone have his undivided attention.”

The other man froze for barely half a second, and if Nagito were anyone else he wouldn’t have noticed. He ducked his head to try and catch those eyes, his smile widening when he was met a very unamused frown. 

“Natsumi was right. You are the weird one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to say that I treasure every comment and I’m glad everyone’s having fun and it’s wonderful motivation and all that sappy stuff!


	9. A peek behind the curtain

**Last But Not Least**

**Ultimate Little Sister:** Paging doctor dumbass @Ultimate Skeptic your patient is asking about you

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** Again?? I just left! I thought one of his classmates was coming to get him?

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** Apparently he’s string cheesing them. I don’t think they even know he’s in the medical building 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** Ugggghhhh

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** You should’ve made him walk instead of carrying him like a fuckin Princess 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** I didn’t carry him!

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** DamselInDespair.png

**Ultimate Little Sister:** Lie to me again??????

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** Mind your damn business???? 

**Ultimate Best Friend:** I just sent Mahiru a message. They should be on their way to collect him soon 

**Ultimate Best Friend:** How are we playing this?

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** It’s a big building we can find a place to hide until everyone is gone 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** Maybe I’ll visit Iwaizumi again. Return his knife right into his fucking eye

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** RAWR WATCH OUT EVERYONE ITS ANGY HAJI

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** What are you 12??

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** On a scale from 1 to 10 💅🏻

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** It’s not as if Komaeda knows my name. I can still work with this 

**Ultimate Best Friend:** How many people do you know with heterochromia???

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** I don’t know any straight people 

**Ultimate Little Sister:** Ultimate Comedian over here!

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** After today I think it would best to drop the charade. If only so you can be distinguished from the guilty 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** They can distinguish me plenty. My nose isn’t broken 

**Ultimate Little Sister:** Still can’t believe you broke his fuckin nose! You been hittin the gym?

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** What I can’t believe is how a stupid prank turned to violence so quickly. You did tell Dean Kirigiri right?

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** Of course I did! 

**Ultimate Best Friend:** Because you have a bad habit of letting secrets pile on top of you until your bones get crushed into chalk dust 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** Me twisting my ankle is not the same as some psycho attacking a main course student 

**Ultimate Best Friend:** You twisted it because you were fighting!

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** Evidence?

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** Thought so

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** Let him be the big bad hero Shimizu! He’s gotta face big brother soon he needs all the help he can get! 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** I’m not scared of Kuzuryu-san 

**Ultimate Little Sister:** There’s also Peko-chan!

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** ….. yeah her I’m a little afraid of 

**Ultimate Best Friend:** “No one really believes those stupid rumors so I’m not going to deny them”

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** “It’s funny! We can play it up for a little while”

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** “If I go missing tell my parents I love them”

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** Are you done?

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** No. But you’re about to be

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** They’re heeeeere!!!

🔍

* * *

🔎

**Future Criminals Club**

**Amulet Spade:** I can’t believe. After all of this. And Chiaki just Says His Name like it’s no big deal

 **Guitar Hero:** The fact that his eyes lit up when he saw her????? Hello??

 **Lotta Hart:** I’ll be honest I didn’t know they knew each other 

**Agent 47:** Tag yourself I’m “there was an incident my freshman year of college so that’s why I wasn’t enrolled”

 **Street Fighter:** Oh oh I’m “I thought about you any time I played Pac-Man, which was a lot I think, back then at least”

 **Larry Butz:** I’m Komaeda when he tried to get out of bed and almost cracked his head on the floor

 **Diner Dash:** “Your reflexes have gotta way better Hinata! We definitely have to battle now” 

**Samus Aran:** We get it you’re flirting! Do it somewhere else!

 **Catherine:** They are still talking! Mikan has taken over caring for Nagito’s injuries 

**Catherine:** And I’ve been informed that the mastermind behind this prank, as well as the individual who harmed our Nagito, is also in the building. An Iwaizumi-san with a broken nose 

**Catherine:** Shall we pay him a visit?

 **Guitar Hero:** Sonia Corruption Arc sexy rt if you agree 

**Larry Butz:** RT

 **Dark Souls:** Rr 

**Diner Dash:** rt 

**Surgeon Simulator:** rt

🔍

* * *

🔎

**Last But Not Least**

**Ultimate Little Sister:** ARE YOU DONE TALKING TO YOUR GF I NEED A RIDE HOME @Ultimate Skeptic

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** Isn’t Fuyuhiko staying home this weekend? Just ride back with him 

**Ultimate Little Sister:** Nooooooooo he’s gonna try to coddle me and I hate that!

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** You love that

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** OH MY GOOOOOD HURRY UP @Ultimate Skeptic

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** SUPER HIGH SCHOOL LEVEL SWEETHEARTS CAN SEXT AT HOME CHOP CHOP @Ultimate Skeptic

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** I’m muting this

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** Omg no don’t leave me like this 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** It’s what you deserve

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** FUCKIN FINALLY WHERE ARE YOU

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** I was helping Nanami take Komaeda to his dorm

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** Awwww I bet he wanted you to carry him again, poor baby

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** Get your ass to the parking lot I’m hungry! If I have to be interrogated by the Dean again I’m starting another fist fight 

**Ultimate Best Friend:** Please don’t 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** Please don’t 

**Ultimate Little Sister:** Can’t believe that freak Iwaizumi. They better expel his ass for this! I don’t care if he got sick!

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** Despair Disease is dangerous. He should’ve known better than to interact with others 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** I’m pretty sure he did it on purpose 

**Ultimate Best Friend:** fucking freak

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** That’s what I said! 

**Ultimate Little Sister:** Speaking of freaks~~~ don’t forget to send your girlie friend a goodnight text 💋 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** Where’s your helmet?

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** He didn’t deny it! You’re lucky I came clean to big brother or your cheating ass would be a skid mark on the road!

 **Ultimate Skeptic:** I Will leave you here you know

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** No you won’t 🥺

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** I told you I’ve been waiting for years I’ve got all my shit and I’m hungry! You’re buying me nuggets on the way home 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** I’m not letting you spoil your appetite like that

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** WHO ARE YOU PEKO?? JESUS 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** Just Hajime is fine

 **Ultimate Little Sister:** Or Hinata~ if you’re Nanami

 **Ultimate Best Friend:** Or Mr Orange 

**Ultimate Skeptic:** Nah. I think that chapter of my life is officially over

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sato **Ultimate Best Friend**  
>  Natsumi **Ultimate Little Sister**  
>  Hajime **Ultimate Skeptic**


End file.
